Yo. No more doubts and i'm back. With some drama. And a long update. At the most inappropriate time.
*Perhaps you know, and i always thought that you know*
I looked back, and i smiled. Memories no matter how sour always turn sweet after a few years, and if you did everything you could you would've no regrets.
*Maybe history's repeating itself?*
The knots are finally untangled after so long. After decades of pondering, ok maybe a month or so, i have finally made a decision. A decision that's not easy for anyone to make (i'm not bragging about this haha.), a promise to myself that i know i will break. It's really not easy at all, i just don't know how much more i can take. The rhyming is not deliberate..
*I'm so so so tempted.*
But anyways,
*Is it really fine to be selfish?*
I realized after all these pondering that as a guy, it's really selfish to confess your feelings to someone when you kinda know it's not gonna work out. Though you'll never know if you never try, the other party will always be hurt in some ways or another after thy confession. (lol) Well it's not exactly true, what i said, but in some cases, these things do happen..
*I really want to be.*
Scrape that.
*But when i think of the consequences..*
Never easy to move on..life itself is never easy..no matter how much you try to have fun, when you're all alone in your room, you're always a different person. Ahhhhhh this is so frustrating. It doesn't really matter how much thinking you've put into something, you'll most likely change your decision at the last moment. This is one heck of a rollercoaster ride i'm on, and whether i fall off or not depends on whether i wanna hold on -.- I'm typing so much useless text now that i feel like backspacing everything..but no i'm still kinda beating about the bush.
*Makes me wonder.*
But no, everything's good as it is..besides, i've been thinking, if love is just a word until you prove it, how do you prove your love to someone? Haha to me love is a self sacrifice.
*Is my selfishness..*
Anyways, Jam for Japan gig coming up at 6.30pm later! Hyakka Ryouran will hopefully do their best to give a performance decent enough to not ruin the musical appetites of the audiences, considering they're the 2nd bands up. It's not just their performance, but other bands' too! Ganbarimasu! I should really go to sleep now but i wonder if i've left anything out...will update once i remember..
*Really worth it?*